Eighteen Years

So, it's our wedding anniversary tomorrow.  January 12, 1992.  Eighteen years ago, I married a man.  Eighteen years later, I am married to a man who has been a good provider and a good man.  Is he the man I was meant to marry?  I remember questioning this a few years ago, and then decided that it wasn't biblical.  So, I will stay.  In a relationship that doesn't make sense to me. But, it's a commitment I made.  Were it not for this marriage, I would not have my 2 sons.  My older son is SUCH a joy.  He & I relate to each other SO well.  And, my younger son is so kind & compassionate.  These boys bless my life in ways unmeasurable.  But, I am lonely.  And I long for a partner who truly appreciates me for who I am.